I’ve talked to women all the time and I have also experienced firsthand not knowing where I stand with a man.
I had an ex that always liked to keep things open and was reluctant to make firm plans.
I found myself so anxious knowing he mentioned getting together Friday night, yet no details or action steps followed.
I would then reach out, and feel horrible when he didn’t respond or said no.
I learned what to do in this scenario the hard way.
My answer to this type of situation is to do nothing, and I will explain why.
When a man has mentioned getting together but hasn’t followed up on it, there are no real plans in his mind.
We think that if we just innocently circle back, then we’ll have the set plans we want and get to see him.
This will not give us what we want though…it only pushes him further away.
He will lose motivation and attraction even more, and over time will stop putting in any effort to move things forward.
This is why knowing that if he mentions something but doesn’t follow up, there are no real plans.
When we move into our feminine energy, we stop waiting for him to decide what he wants.
We know that we are worth effort and we stop trying to make something happen.
If a man isn’t saying a specific time on a specific date, the plans are not set.
If you find yourself in this position, I know how difficult this can feel!
You really want to see him, so it seems innocent enough to make yourself available.
What this is energetically communicating though is that his time is more valuable than yours. That he doesn’t have to put in the effort or work to see you.
He will feel that you are putting him before yourself so he’ll naturally put less into the relationship.
Three ways to change this dynamic quickly:
1. Honor Your Life and Plans No Matter What
What does this look like?
Let’s say he mentions plans on a Monday for Friday if that week.
It is good to let him know early on that you’re a woman with a full life so you need advanced notice.
That can look like:
“That feels great- I’d love that. I make plans for my weekends early so would love the details before Thursday.”
Let’s say then he then doesn’t contact you until Friday afternoon. By then it’s too late as you’ve already made other plans!
“Other Plans” can mean reading a good book and taking a bubble bath.
It’s about setting that boundary for ourselves and not accepting less than what we know we deserve.
He then doesn’t get to see you and he will feel that consequence over time. He will know that if he wants to see you, he has to plan it in advance.
No words required, no arguing, or drama. This is communicated through your actions in a way where he can feel it.
2. Make Your Own Life A Priority
Stop waiting and start feeling good now!
As you learn to feel good independent of him, a space has been created for him to move closer.
He will feel that you’re a woman that knows how to make her own happiness, which will then make him want to contribute to that even more. Masculine energy men fall in love when they’re giving.
Happy women are the most attractive women and when we learn to be happy now vs. later, he is drawn to that in a powerful way.
3. Shift Your Thinking To Ignite His Attraction
When we’re feeling frustrated with our situation or with what a man is offering, it’s easy to continue to go down the path of looking for evidence to support that.
We start seeing all the bad and nothing good!
When our thinking is negative,we lose the ability to see the situation clearly.
Our thinking and beliefs about what we deserve are critical in igniting attraction.
-He’s never going to call, I should reach out because I really want to see him.
-I need to follow up in case he forgot
-I need to show him what an amazing girlfriend I am
-I know that unless it comes from him it’s not going to feel good.
-I deserve to be loved just as I am.
-I don’t need to remind a man that I’m around.
-I’m worthy of the love I want.
Feel into this as you say it. Just saying it or writing it down isn’t as powerful as when we practice feeling into it and get excited about all the good things on their way.
If you’re in a situation with a man where you feel like you’re not sure where you stand- I am confident that I can help you turn that around.
Contact me here to apply for a complimentary discovery session.
I love reading the quote below as a reminder to let go, surrender, and remember we don’t have to do or prove anything to have the love we want.
“Nothing beautiful asks for attention.”